I’ve taken a break from blogging for the past few weeks – from this and my last post you’ll know why words have deserted me for a while. Strange to be a writer struck dumb, stripped of the basic tools of my trade. Anyway, I’m back with a link up to the lovely Five Minute Friday community. I do recommend your checking out all the other talented and inspirational writers there: http://fiveminutefriday.com/2017/08/24/fmf-linkup-guide/
As I walk through this land of bereavement, the path is definitely rocky and I have found myself barren of words – unable to write and unable to answer the question everyone asks: ‘How are you?’ I have battled against the desert winds, leaning into them just to keep going, to keep semi upright, through shock, officialdom, and feelings of abandonment.
But I have travelling companions and we take it in turns to lean against each other, lending and borrowing strength, urging each other on up each steep incline. Late nights listening to memories and pillowing each other’s tears. Days with reassuring words and holding hands through the legal tasks.
Tiny oases of love appear along the way: a cup of tea, a hug from a colleague, a card full of recollections, a message of support, permission to pace myself.
I am being guided ‘through this barren land’. ‘The crystal fountain’ with its ‘healing stream’ is flowing here. I am being led ‘all my journey through’ and I will (eventually) ‘land…safe on Canaan’s side’. Just like my Dad has.
Guide me, O thou great Jehovah,
pilgrim through this barren land.
I am weak, but thou art mighty;
hold me with thy powerful hand.
Bread of heaven, bread of heaven,
feed me till I want no more;
feed me till I want no more.
Open now the crystal fountain,
whence the healing stream doth flow;
let the fire and cloudy pillar
lead me all my journey through.
Strong deliverer, strong deliverer,
be thou still my strength and shield;
be thou still my strength and shield.
When I tread the verge of Jordan,
bid my anxious fears subside;
death of death and hell’s destruction, l
and me safe on Canaan’s side.
Songs of praises, songs of praises,
I will ever give to thee;
I will ever give to thee.
Text: William Williams, 1717-1791; trans. from the Welsh by Peter Williams and the author Music: John Hughes, 1873-1932 Tune: CWM RHONDDA